American in France - 2005

Can we not have some fun when we talk?

While being here, speaking and listening to French, I can’t help but feel like I am speaking an archaic language. In the States each generation is somewhat marked by a vocabulary that is characteristic of the time. In the seventies it was “groovy”, in the eighties it was “far out”, the nineties brought new meaning to the words “bad” and “cool” and today it’s “sick” even if you’re well. French does not seem to have these time markers as far as I can tell and even the slang seems to have been approved by the French Academy of Language. Everyone from six to ninety uses the same words: “putin” (dammit) and “merde” (shit), neither of which carry the same power as swear words in English. 

Along the same lines, in English, we love to play with words, inventing new words and phrases as we go along. You can even purchase books to learn how to have a more relevant vocabulary. However, in French, while there may be many ways to say the same thing, there is only way that is best. If it is not used, although understood, you will be corrected. Liberty of language is therefore sacrificed for purity of speech. 

I now realise that there is a certain freedom in speaking a language that is not concerned with maintaining a standard of beauty within its form. The English language does not fear change, but embraces it. 

I can’t speak English in French

One thing that is probably amusing to any American in France is the influx of English words translated into the French language. However you have to pay attention because they are almost never translated correctly and they are absolutely never pronounced correctly. For example: when we would say, “that was great”, the French would say,  “c’était top”. You might also hear “fun, too much, snow, skate and cool”. However, all these English words are pronounced in a heavy French accent and if I as an American were to pronounce them correctly, I would not be understood. Nevertheless, I am relearning the American vocabulary with a French twist. 

So no one is “thankful” around here?

It was upon trying to teach a group of French students about Thanksgiving that I realised that there is no translation for the word thankful. You can thank someone and you can be cognisant of good things, but you can’t be just generally “thankful”. The adjective or general state of being does not exist. I am not sure what this has to say about the French culture, but as an American it seems a bit of a shame not to be able to say, “I am thankful for…”

The “American” dream

For my first lesson in teaching English I decided to open with discussion about ambitions and dreams since it was a group of young people. I anticipated the usual responses: I would like to be an actor, actress, rock star, scientist, doctor or even president. However, as I went around the room, the majority of the students responded with one of three responses. 1- I have never really thought about it 2- I don’t know or 3- some very practical answer like becoming a mechanic. It was at this moment that I realised that the dream is “American”. 

American students grow up being told that the world is at their fingertips. If you can see it, you can be it. Even if a teacher knows that her student is way too intellectually clumsy to become a doctor, she would never discourage him from dreaming. On the other hand, French students are reminded everyday of the harsh realities and barriers that are set before them. 

I took this culture shock to heart. As an American I hate the idea of not being encouraged to dream. I feel that it is this capacity that has given way to much of our “Yankee ingenuity”. However, I can’t help but thinking that maybe a little reality would be good for some of us Americans, including myself as I am still searching for a career. You have to wonder how the grandiose visions we have of ourselves when we are young play a role in the “midlife crises” we endure as we age. 

For the French there is no fear of mediocrity, no pressure to be better than what you are, but rather the quiet acceptance of what has been given. 

Did you know that the French are not adept in learning English or even French for that matter?

American education honours mediocrity. Even if you’re an idiot, your sure to get a prize at the end of the spelling bee. Why? To Americans self-esteem is more important than truth. On the contrary, French education honours no one. Even if you are a genius, you will never be Voltaire, against whom you are constantly measured. 

I have had so many French students tell me that they just are not skilled in English. I was beginning to think this might be true until I finally observed an English class taught by a French professor. Each student was berated in front of the class while his work was being openly denounced by the professor. While this may seem atrocious to most Americans, it is actually not quite so bad, as the French do not see work as a reflection of self like most Americans. All the same, it is a very punitive system the French have. 

That being noted, it has been my experience in learning a language that what is most important, more that grammar or vocabulary, is confidence. Even if you know all the grammar in the world, it won’t mean a thing if you haven’t got the nerve to test you ability out in the real world. In my opinion, it is at this point that the education of language arrives at a great “faux pas” in France. 

I believe it is for these same reasons that most French students have an underlined insecurity with regard to their ability to spell in French. Granted French spelling is not easy, but they are never encouraged when they get it right and they are always reminded when they get it wrong. 

 

So you guys do not have stereotypes?

One day I decided to open class with the word “stereotype” written on the board. Afterwards I divided the blackboard into two sections and wrote the words “American” and “French”. While I was sure that they would start yelling out suggestions almost immediately, everyone was silent. I then asked, “Who can tell me what a stereotype is?” No answer. Now the word “stereotype” is the same in French as it is in English, but nevertheless, I then asked in French, “C’est quoi un stereotype?” Finally one student suggested that it might be a radio station. I was shocked. They did not know. I then explained to them that there is a French stereotype that the Portuguese are hairy. After a good laugh, they finally began to understand. 

It was at this point that all the American stereotypes leaped out of their little French mouths, a humbling experience. “They are fat, rich, like plastic surgery, love war, have big cars, carry guns, don’t care about the environment, listen to loud music and have great movies.” After this brief American summary I then asked for the French stereotypes and was amused as I listened to their responses. “We are beautiful and sophisticated. We like cheese and wine.” After a bit of this, I then asked for some American stereotypes of the French. They were at a loss. I so badly wanted to let them know that they smell, don’t bathe, don’t shave and keep putting on more cologne, but I held my tongue. 

Instead I asked them if stereotypes were true or false. After a bit of reflection, they simultaneously concluded that they must be true. (Not the response I was looking for). After all the D.A.R.E. courses I had had as a kid growing up in California, all of the discussions on tolerance and the appreciation of differences, I could not believe that the French did not teach stereotypes to their children as a means of controlling racism. I then tried explained that stereotypes may be true for a majority, but not for every individual within a particular people group. “Consequently, because there are many people groups living together in the United States, I try never to judge anyone according to a stereotype as this often leads to racism.” This seemed to go over fairly well.

One thing that Americans do understand, even if they do not know how to correct it, is how they are perceived. We are also keenly aware of the problems that arise when judging individuals according to the standard of a group. This was the first time in my life that I really understood how fortunate I am to have grown up in a multi-cultural environment. Cultural sensitivity is not easily taught, yet invaluable once acquired. 

Fat Americans

First of all; if you are going to buy a crêpe, don’t ask for nutella AND jam. You will just confirm every judgement the French have of Americans. I already made that mistake. 

When I first got here I was bemused by how small everything was, the portions and the people. Really, the secret to the French diet is simple. A- They actually take time to eat, rather than on the go and in the car like many Americans. B- They eat small portions and they eat slowly, it is always a social event. C- Their biggest meal is lunch, unlike most Americans who have a huge dinner and then a late night snack right before going to bed, and D- They walk. While many Americans will spend twenty minutes scanning a parking lot to get twenty feet closer to the location, the French simply walk. 

At first I wanted to defend Americans and suggest that we are not ALL fat. However, upon continually viewing the trim little bodies of French men and women, I have concluded that they are right. It is time to accept that we are fat.